Saturday, October 3, 2009

Abusive Women and Male Victims

It has been said that a man who exhibits the following behaviors in relationship is abusive. It would stand to reason, then, that a woman who exhibits these behaviors is an abusive woman.
Men who get involved with abusive women are typically those who had abusive childhood home environments. This kind of upbringing tends to normalize abusive behavior in all relationships.

What this means is that men from this kind of a background are not as keen to the subtleties of abuse the way “healthy” men are.

On a positive note, there is a silver lining here—all behavior can be relearned, including the ability to recognize early signs of abuse as unacceptable behaviors in a relationship. Once this is learned, a man will be able to break free from unhealthy relationships with women who are not good for him.

You might review this list to see if you might be in an abusive relationship. This is a list of common abusive behaviors to watch for:

Criticism about your good qualities
Past abusive relationships
Criminal activities
Drinking or drug problems, past or present
Mood swings
Discourages your successes
Abusive family members or spouses of siblings
Attempts to control your whereabouts
Disrespect toward your publicly or privately
Violations of others rights
Attempts to keep you isolated
Persistent lying
History of truancy, delinquency and running away
Highly reactive
Streaks of meanness toward others for no reason
Threatened by relationships with other women, past, present or imagined

In order to recognize early abusive signs, a man must stop rationalizing “abusive” behaviors as “normal.” If he sees ONE abusive behavior, regardless of how small, he needs to remind himself that it IS abuse. Period! With this new skill, he will soon be dating women who treat him with dignity and respect—the way all men deserve to be treated.

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